O hai there, John Mayer!

Watching John Mayer made me wet.  Literally.

It was a rainy Friday night last October 1 when 18,000+ people (per Manila Concerts) trooped to the MOA Concert Grounds to watch John Mayer and his band perform for the first time here in the Philippines.  This concert was initially scheduled in May but was cancelled with no reason given [I can only guess it’s something about the security level given that it’s our national elections?].  Months flew by fast and thanks to my very awesome friends (Hi, Rhiza & Nena!), I scored 2 Gold tickets to watch the show.  I dragged Raft3r with me (and he sorta blogged about it, too) and it’s one of the most unforgettable events of my 2010, I swear.

I mentioned a few times in this blog that I am a late bloomer John Mayer fan.  It didn’t take me long to love his music; light rock with amazing riffs that makes you want to pick up a guitar and play it, too.  Of course,the melody is only half of it.  If you listen to John’s songs, some are idealistic, some are dreamy, and the rest are just so angsty, bitter, and so painful in a love-filled kind of way.  I thought James Morrison could fill the soundtrack of my life very well; he also can, but certainly not in a way that John Mayer’s songs can.

Anyway, back to the concert.  Veteran concert-goers as they are, Rachel and Raft3r both advised me to secure a raincoat just in case the rain won’t stop.  Umbrellas are okay but it will annoy many people behind you.  I saw it happen and I was one of those annoyed, by the way.

After getting my tickets at EDSA Shang, I went back to MOA to finally buy a transparent raincoat.  It proved very useful even if I still got wet (my being a clumsy doofus had a lot to do with it. It’s a long story, lol).

After a quick dinner, we went to the concert venue and I was impressed because it started on time.  A few minutes after 8 pm, Aiza Seguerra and her band were already doing their 4-song act.  I got inside on Aiza’s second song and people started filling up the designated space for each ticket holders.  By the way, Aiza is a great performer.  She has showmanship and she can really go a long way.

When John appeared around 8:40 pm, heavy rain poured as strongly as the crowd’s cheers.  It’s surreal hearing him sing live! Admittedly, because of the golf umbrellas that the Platinum ticket holders were holding up, I got a real glimpse of John on his second song already.  There was one lady at the Platinum section who did not use an umbrella at all and was happily singing with John and raising her arms in the air all throughout the show.  You go, girl! I hope you didn’t get sick!

This was how it looked from my seat for the first few songs during the concert. At one point, I had to watch from the video wall because there's no John at all but a sea of golf umbrellas!

In total, John sang 16 songs and played one awesome instrumental the title of which escapes me now.  HE’S AMAZING.  I love how he’s so passionate about his music.  He changed guitars more than three times and he made a great job with each.  HE’S GOT AMAZING FINGERS, I TELL YA.

Here’s a list of songs from his set.  He barely talked to the audience and to me, it’s okay.  He has a lot of songs that I understood it’s hard to pick just a select few.  I would have personally wanted to hear St. Patrick’s Day and My Stupid Mouth but what he performed were okay.

Vultures – I love this song.  It’s the #1 official track of my quarterlife crisis.  LOL.

No Such Thing – I tried to live tweet during the concert and I mistakenly said it’s Love Song For No One.  Sorry 🙂

Perfectly Lonely – If you know this song, the first chords will make you jump from your seat in excitement.  Well, that’s what it did to me!

Slow Dancing in a Burning Room – Man, I love this song.  Can I be silly for a second? See what I tweeted when John’s singing it >> Well, technically, he once wrote an e-mail with the lyrics to this song and I believe it was his way of telling me something I already knew then but I was just too stubborn to face.  I don’t know what kind of experience John had but it’s cool to know that these feelings (see the lyrics) can be universally shared.  Anyway, it’s all in the past!

Ain’t No Sunshine – His cover of this Bill Withers classic brought a tingle to my spine.  No kidding!

Waiting on the World to Change – ❤

Stop This Train – I had a great time singing to this.  The bridge is a super favorite.  It’s the 2nd official song in my quarterlife crisis playlist.  LOL.

Your Body is a Wonderland – Who wouldn’t know this song if you speak of John Mayer???

Who Says – The situation doesn’t appeal to me now as it did before but these lines from the song will always be spot-on: I don’t remember you looking any better / But then again, I don’t remember you .

Hearbreak Warfare – My friend Em made a private joke about it and because it’s hella corny, I will not spill it here 🙂

Gravity – Admittedly, I was introduced to this song when I heard it being used in a season 3 episode of [H]ouse in 2006.  Amazing song.

Do You Know Me – I don’t know if he appended this song with a wonderful instrumental or it was a separate piece in itself.  Nonetheless, it made me so dreamy and wished he would just play for me forever and ever.  Uh, a little exaggerated but the general sentiment is the same 🙂

Why Georgia – Before he sang this, he said he wrote this song in 1999 and it was released in 2000.  So it’s like going  back in time ten years past and picking a song that’s meaningful to him. ❤

Don’t Stop Believing – It’s a good song that’s ruined by hype, I’m sorry.  But John sang it well, albeit a little cheesy, and that’s good enough for me.

Half of my Heart – The band’s last song!

Edge of Desire – John’s encore song.  I knew he’d be back when he said thank you after Half of my Heart because he added, “I’ll be back soon” or something like it.  The song’s powerful and angsty, I love it so much! It’s a great way to end an equally great show.

When John took his final bow, he clasped his hands and “Namaste’d” us 😉 It’s so cute.  His behind is also cute.  I like men with “just right baggy pants”.  Have I told you how I so dig his wavy hair, too?  He’s like sex on legs.  Regardless of his racist, racy, douchy comments on many things when a microphone is in front of him, I still love him.  In fact, part of my fascination is because of it.  You can’t believe it? Well, have long have you known me??? 🙂

I truly enjoyed watching the concert and it’s a bit sad that the rain prevented me from taking lots of pictures.  Here are several from the ones I took: Continue reading

Strumming My Non-Pain With His Fingers

The anticipation to let this out isn’t like last night.  Still, let me show the videos that made me so flighty last night. 🙂

I was a latebloomer to John Mayer‘s music but I know his more popular songs like Daughters and Gravity (when it was used in a House episode).  About 20 months ago, I began listening to his albums; people who share office space with me could affirm that the songs have been playing over and over in my workstation. His albums Room For Squares, Heavier Things and Continuum contributed so much to the soundtrack of my crazy 2008 and early 2009. I am eagerly waiting for his album in the works, Battle Studies, to finish.

I have to admit I became more interested when he dated Jen Aniston. Hmm, guilty pleasure, hello, Jen/Rachel Green? That’s when I discovered he’s awesome in Judie standards.  As my friends put it in gayspeak, bonggang bongga si John Mayer sa aking libro. Have you seen his “performance face”? Yun parang contorted in a way you can’t place if in agony or in freak pleasure? I love love love it. 🙂 🙂 🙂 Let’s not forget how he plays the guitar very well (again, in my barometer).  Amazing, graceful fingers! Hmmm. *keels over*

Two nights ago, my friend Rach casually asked me if I already watched John and Chris Botti’s performance. WHUT? John Mayer and Chris Botti in one sentence, more so in one performance? How the hell did I miss it? Thanks to youtube, I found it.  It was on Letterman last Thanksgiving; I watched his previous Thanksgiving appearances on that show eh malay ko bang pati 2008 di nya ise-spare.  Anyway, here it is. Sabi nga ni Chuvaness, eyeloveit 🙂

A few months later, John was a guest in Chris’ show where, guitar-less, he sang Sinatra’s Glad To Be Unhappy. Niiice.

I like all of John Mayer’s songs but if I have to rank them, my top four would be St. Patrick’s Day, Vultures, I’m Gonna Find Another You and Slow Dancing In A Burning Room.  Short pa ng isa, top five na sana, hahaha! Let’s say the rest share the fifth spot. 🙂

Here’s his performance of Slow Dancing In A Burning Room which I particularly love:

Spanking guitar. Love his hair, too. Ganyan mga gusto ko. S*x hair! Hahaha! 🙂

Here’s when he sang I’m Gonna Find Another You three Thanksgivings ago:

Finally, here’s John doing my most favorite rendition of St. Patrick’s Day.  Type ko yung energy level nya here. Subdued kasi yung sa iba when he sang this. Look at his face! 🙂 🙂 🙂 1:11 made me giddy and starting from 2:04 till the end, kinikilig na ako. Yeah. 🙂


There. Now that they’re off my chest, I’m feeling okay. 😉 I believe I haven’t used this many smileys before. 🙂 🙂 🙂 [O ayan na naman.]

Day 1: tears and fears and feeling proud

I terribly enjoyed the fifth season finale of House, Both Sides Now. A great wrap of a great season. See you in September for Season Six, you guys. I have no time and energy to dissect everything but I truly believe Hugh Laurie deserves to nab all Drama Actor awards out there next awards season.

The morning before the episode aired, The New York Times ran a very spoiler-heavy article about it. Here are excerpts of the write up that gained my seal of approval 🙂

The show’s maddening appeal is its insistence on dressing up like a soap opera as it willfully declines to behave like one…

Of course the producers of “House” don’t care about our fantasies and instead poured a big bucket of Freon on our mushy sucker hearts. “House” treats the women who watch it the way House treats women generally: It mocks them for any genuine emotional investment…

“House” refuses to buy into the myth that a good woman can save an ornery jerk, and the finale made it clear what a dope you were to even think the show would try. It doesn’t want to appease the woman who wants to appease her Harlequin Romance self. It wants to appease anyone who gets ticked off when a romantic comedy shows an accomplished woman in a skirt suit giving it all up for a jobless, slovenly idiot.

The House-Cuddy attraction isn’t an attraction of opposites. It’s an attraction between two highly intelligent workaholics, two people too interesting for anyone else but ultimately unfit for each other — no matter how pathetically we’d like it to be otherwise. (Source)

◊  ♦  ◊

I had to scrimp a little this year so because of the uncool points they garnered from what they did to me, I decided to let go of my Vanity Fair subscription for this cycle. The magazine is one of my guilty pleasures so a tiny part of me (begs the question, is there a tiny part of me? LOL) did not want the unsubscription; I thought of very interesting personalities and features gracing the issues I would miss. Then I found out that the very first issue I’ll miss will have Jessica Simpson on the cover. Hah. It’s the universe’s way of telling me, “Honey, you will never miss much!”

♦  ◊  ♦

I am still singing to Tamia’s ALMOST. My drama queen phase is not over yet (and it will never die, hahaha). I’m not thinking of myself and possibly man/boy anymore, no. House and Cuddy maybe. The angst-less kind, the type who cringe at a Huddy ever after. With great pain comes great satisfaction. Hm, that’s a good motto.

◊  ♦  ◊

SEVEN days to go. With several errands and dates here and there, I wish to take a real form of rest. 🙂

Exhaust it until it dies.

When a particular tune catches my attention, I usually listen to it over and over and over until I grow tired of it. This is an example of that.  I’ve listened to this song, Almost (by Tamia), in 2007 pa but I only took this kind of liking today, when I woke up. Of course I know why but even without the reason, the song is beautiful as it is.

Buy the album * Lyrics


(There you go, Raft3r, I made my own filler post!)

The Incoherent.

This post may not bear much difference from my other blog entries. Except perhaps this was typed when I was a tiny bit sloshed.

by-iconfluence-at-ljLet’s see…I vowed to stop pining after a momentary confusion (see entry below this). I still cannot just laugh at it because I still have things left unsaid. However, when I accepted an “all-encompassing” apology, it’s tantamount to flushing all else I want to say down the drain. It’s still pride, I guess. I should be grateful there was an effort to bring it back to what it once was, even though face it, it will never be the same. Anyway, I am trying hard to just focus on “this is what we have”, no matter how small, how trivial, how limited, how shallow it is; I know it’s all I – we – have and I better guard it with care because it isn’t as strong as I thought it was before. This isn’t even about the romance fluff anymore; I accepted its fate, what just blew my top was when the friendship itself was threatened. Oh well, I’m going back there again and I know it’s futile.

After everything that happened, I take comfort in a simple realization that I was chosen to be put in the friendship “receptacle” because in the long run, without offense to other “receptacles”, where he put me in was the one guaranteed to last longer, perhaps forever. If only for that, I am happy.

~ ~ ~

I was with two of my best girlfriends for dinner and even if we discussed it before, I never felt more determined to do the following: do what makes me happy, increase my feeling of self-worth, think positive and more importantly, do not take life too seriously. Four rather easy steps if only I change my mindset. Drama is all in my mind.

~ ~ ~

A House/Cuddy fan created a gif image file of their kiss last episode. I get it, most fans are crazy in a fandom-mish kind of way, and I’m inclined to join their bandwagon when I see, say, a close-up gif image of House and Cuddy kissing with tongue. Some fans turned batshit crazy after seeing it; not me, but I liked it.

~ ~ ~

James Morrison and Amos Lee, thank you for your music; keeping me company in these times of…sleeplessness. I am waiting to feel sober and feel sleepy. Whichever comes first will be welcomed with delight.

Alcohol and caffeine, with loads of cholesterol in between, could make me do this kind of thing.

i’m half-asleep all day but…

I just have to say these things.

Danny Gokey did well tonight. I loved his choice of song, too. I’m a words-before-melody kind of listener so when one sings anything by Rascal Flatts, I’m sure to listen well. Part of why I liked Danny tonight was his song, What Hurts The Most, which he Gokey-fied, so to speak.

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do


Kris Allen was awesome, too. Ain’t No Sunshine, as in the Bill Withers classic, is one of my favorites in my playlist. Adam Lambert was cool but even if I appreciate the spunk, his shrieks and wails get too boring. He’s interesting, yes, but I think his range is actually limited. We’re all just awed by him. Para syang ‘outlier’. My crush, Matt Giraud, for me did well, too. Eh, I love that song that he did by The Fray eh.

The rest of the contestants were okay but Megan Joy should go home tomorrow night.

Now I will sleep early. I have to do this so I can see my thirties.  Damn, I’ll miss Chelsea and Chuy.

[Last na ito, promise. Doesn’t it bother you when you hear this on TV? –  “That Beddy es sooo irridading. She shed be keeked out of Ehcuh-Mowda.”  (Original line goes: That Betty is so irritating. She should be kicked out of Eco-Moda.)   Haiii.]

You know you got it bad when…

→ you approve Facebook friend requests from your highschool and Beautiful Ones by Suede pops in your head, and becomes your song of the day. Maybe it’s the closest I got to actually reminiscing my high school days. And oh look I found it:

(click here if the video doesn’t work; the uploader initially prevented embedding it)

→ you already mistake people for someone you kind of miss, and you actually get very disappointed when you take a second look and it’s just someone who walks or dresses like him.

→ you ask all the celestial beings to distract you from ((see above)) and they respond fast; say, through an email from someone who hinted, “guess who’s in town?

→ you promptly finish an office job (where you tried your best, which was properly recognized, not that you’re asking for it) to shower your eyes with House episode updates, and feeling VERY bad when you realize that you totally forgot the reminder that it won’t air as scheduled because of their president’s press conference!

→ you politely ignore a kickass caldereta to satisfy your craving for sardines with semi-cooked egg.

→ you feel sleepy before 9 p.m.

→ you watch John Mayer on Ellen and after a while, you feel that you actually like him more than Jennifer Aniston. The guy is hilarious, and yes, he may be a douchebag, but hey, have you taken note of my taste in men, especially lately? Right. See?

→ you haven’t read a book, not even a short chapter or two, for almost week. Now, that’s just odd. Something must be done to correct this disgusting error.


Some say that a surefire way to get over something is to stuff yourself full of whatever it is until you get tired of it, and then you move on.

So despite my annoyance with wordpress for not having the capability to have music files embedded in either blog posts or sidebars, here’s a song that’s looped in my head all day (linked to a youtube audio clip):

And I am running to you baby,
You are the only one who saves me
That’s why I’ve been missing you lately,
‘Cause you make it real for me

[from You Make It Real by James Morrison]

Napansin ko lang, may hawig si James Morrison kay BB Gandanghari.

Anyway, I’m not counting on getting tired of this song soon. Matagal ako makalimot eh, matagal. And hindi ko na pinipilit. Hanggat gusto ko pa, sige lang. Mawawala din yan. And then I can move on.

On another matter, oh God, I am so bored.

I’m an organized mess.

My two loyal commenters, Raft3r and Laieesha, guess who’s alive?!

It’s PMS time. I just know. It occurred roughly around the same time last month.

pink elephantOne big thing about me now, and I guess the pun is intended, is that I’m as huge as a pregnant cow. Really. Or like a mini-van. I carried on my holiday weight and indulged myself more because it was my birthday last month. I was in the washroom yesterday and I confirmed that I look like a big oil barrel with too many accessories on. Did I love everything that led me to it? Oh, absolutely.

For one, Marty’s Cracklin’ Vegetarian Chicharon is the best discovery I had this early in the year! It’s by Oishi, which is coming up with good snack choices (parang awkward na magkatabi sa sentence yung ‘good junk food’), after the 2007 junk food manna called Bread Pan. So, Marty’s. I kidded Rach na she should be eating that (because her last name’s Marty, haha, wala lang). It’s dehydrated green peas and dehydrated potatoes. It comes in plain and vinegar flavors but I prefer the former more. I eat it with mayonnaise. You know how I love mayo, right? I am very easy to please and this one never fails. I’ve skipped too many decent dinners because my palate only wanted Marty’s dipped in mayo, Dove dark choco bar para pambalance, and Silk vanilla soymilk pantulak. Hay. Better than sex, parang yung cake, although I have no way of knowing if it’s true. Hahaha! At this rate, I’m happy with it. This habit may start to create “Hello, liver damage and UTI!” banners soon but you do not deprive someone who’s terribly PMSing!

Aside from that, I’ve been eating too much chocolates. It’s SDB’s fault. A lot of people conveniently gave them bags and bags of chocolates last Christmas and since her son does not like most chocolates, dinadala nya sa office para di sayang. The horror that it did to our sugar levels. Pero are we happy? Naturalmente. Eating is fun.

Other than food, my daily travels give me constant joy. My taxi drivers have been classic entertainers: may umaaway sa asawa sa phone, may nanliligaw sa phone, may nakikibalita sa balikbayang kumpare sa phone…all conducted while they’re driving! Magaling, magaling, magaling. No accidents so far but I’ve been fairly attentive since my route is Quirino Avenue and ang intersection dyan ay kasingdami ng mga nag-o-audition sa American Idol.

When going home, I take the jeep na lang and you know what’s the cringe-worthy but very amusing song na sikat ngayon sa ENERGY FM? The rendition of The Teeth’s LAKLAK to the tune of Rodel Naval’s LUMAYO KA MAN SA AKIN. Laugh trip, sobra. But if you listen closely, you’ll just laugh at how the lyrics fit. This is the closest I could find so you could hear it. It makes your jeep-riding experience very uniquely Pinoy. Buti nga lumipas na yung Tagalog version ng UMBRELLA and LOW. Those were really annoying.

So what else? Still watching and re-watching HOUSE. I miss Stacy. I have too many thoughts on the show but I’ll save them when I’m not this messed up.

You should watch UNITED STATES OF TARA though. This early, I vote Toni Collette for Best Actress in 2010’s Emmy’s, SAG or Golden Globes. As regards the category, I don’t know where it would fall under. It’s BOTH drama and comedy. But do check it out.

Raft3r and Chelli might hit me with a giant hammer because…(later)

I resent it that I get stimulated to unleash the best I could do in a given task ONLY when someone is unleashing his/her own best. That part of me who simply does things well regardless of competition has long died. I don’t feel it’s good for me because stimulants very rarely come my way…so most of the time, nabubulok lang ako, deteriorating, brain melting. The desire to better myself then extinguishes itself and by the time a stimulant comes along, I start “unleashing” from scratch and most times, I feel I haven’t done it all kasi nga…walang practice. I hate myself…not entirely,but just this part. I NEED CONSTANT STIMULATION. Although sabi nga ni “God” sa Evan Almighty, when you ask for (stimulation), it is not provided to you in that form, opportunities to be (stimulated) ang binibigay. Eh ayoko ng ganun. Tsk. Damaged person, I am.

I used to think maybe I peaked too early. Lately though, I tell myself, siraulo ka, anong early, how sure are you na may REAL peak ka na tlagang naabot? So yeah it’s like I’m just beginning my journey pero nahinto na ako dito. By choice? I don’t know. (PMS, remember?)

Not to belittle my crazy mind, I naturally enjoy following the trail of the new Department of State – from the personalities, old and new, down to the policies and challenges. Close to home.

That, along with American Idol, more HOUSE, and mass market suspense thrillers. Eh ganun eh.

Best motivation – I am not awesome to everyone, but I am to many, including myself. That should be enough to get me by.

I guess just like Princeton in Avenue Q, I have to find my purpose.

Plus even if it’s starting to turn my little brain into mush, the constant ringing of James Morrison’s The Only Night in my head, though only the lines, “If this is where I ended up, then I refuse to be so hard on myself this time” baka naman it’s telling me something ‘no? What do you think?

It’s okay now…what are you still worried about?

I watched Bride Wars with LC today. My first movie for 2009! I was scheduled to catch ‘Benjamin Button’ (why are Brad’s movie titles so long? Remember that one with Assassination?) but Rach had an urgent errand so we postponed that [Spinsters Inc.] movie date to next week.

I’m not much fond of Kate Hudson nor Anne Hathaway but both of them were cute in the movie. Yeah, cute. The movie was cute, too. I cannot think of other words because watching it did not require much thinking anyway but it’s still entertaining. I like the songs used in the movie! Will look for its soundtrack soon. My favorite of all is Happy by Natasha Bedingfield. It’s amusing to have heard a song and you don’t appreciate it much until it’s used in a movie. I love it so much I think it’s going to be my birthday song. 🙂

Got my dreams, got my life, got my love
Got my friends, got the sunshine above
Why am I making this hard on myself
When there’s so many beautiful reasons I have to be happy

Oh yeah, birthday vibes coming in and they couldn’t be more fantastic.

I wrote something in my journal a while ago with these feelings hovering in my head, and mushy as it may seem, I actually cried a little bit. They’re the happy kind of tears though. I guess it’s the cotton-fluffy feelings brought by the weather and my guiding moons and stars aligning perfectly at this time of year.


When I got home, I was glad to catch up on the second half of the Missouri leg of American Idol auditions. Confirmed! I officially like Kara Dioguardi!


You do not alter Vera to fit you, you alter yourself to fit Vera!
– wedding gown shop sales assistant, commenting on the risk of gaining weight between buying a Vera Wang wedding dress and the actual wedding day

The International Butter Club? You mean you’ve actually been sitting around eating sticks of butter?
– Daniel to Liv, asking about the baskets of goodies she thought he has been sending her to be thoughtful

These two lines, along with Marion St. Claire’s lines at the end which I failed to remember completely, were reasons enough to like Bride Wars. I give it 6/10. 🙂


Got my dreams, got my life, got my love
Got my friends, got the sunshine above
Why am I making this hard on myself
When there’s so many beautiful reasons I have to be HAPPY?

I just had to repeat that because it made more sense now.

I once wrote, I always have this fear that I will never measure up to anyone and it will be the reason why I will be left behind…(T)hat’s why I eagerly try to be this best person I thought he would like…losing a large chunk of who I really am in the process. I wrote it in particular reference to how I deal with men but I realized, I have been doing it in many of my relationships, with many different people, for a damn long time. So not healthy, right? I will change courses this year.  Anyway, much more of this is in my journal, I simply can’t help but share a sliver of my thoughts because I’m feeling good about almost everything now. Birthday vibes, positive aura, name it, I probably got it. I hope it stays for good. Three days to go!!!