Oblivious No More

Look who's distracted.Obliviousness used to be a trait I was very good at.  I’m not talking about not caring in general because that will open up a can of unpretty (and a few delightful) worms.  I’m referring to being unaware of what’s happening when I’m engrossed in something — reading, specifically.  I think I shared this a few times already, that for some reason I like being lost in the midst of things.  However, I noticed that I’m distracted too easily lately.  I used to not hear nor notice anything when I’m reading but take my Thursday reading time for example: I was distracted by a group next to my table discussing (calmly, in-their-own-small-circle kind of way) osmolysis and ruptured cell membranes that I stopped reading and tinkered my tablet instead.

I’m thinking about it because it seems contrary to another feeling I started having in recent years which is sifting.  I used to like grasping and learning everything.  Looking back, I think it’s because of fear of being left behind.  I evolved, gladly, away from it, and learned to filter what I only want and need.  A certified TV junkie, a concrete example would be the shows I regularly follow — I now stick to 5 regulars even when the number of shows seemed to have doubled than five years ago.  My regulars back in ’07-’09 added up to 18 TV shows a week; that’s a tremendous abuse of the Fair Use policy, don’t you think?  Anyway, I slightly digress.

Maybe it’s simply telling me that caring and focusing are indeed two different things.  I wish to regain my sense of obliviousness though.  It feels a long time ago since I allowed myself to get inside the world of what I was reading.  I don’t want to believe it’s because I have a lot in my mind lately.  If you must know, there’s a zillion stuff going on in my head even before, back when I still can auto-shut off the world and be inside a new one.  Is it the same as indifference?  Maybe, maybe not.  But then, even for a short time, both of them can be healthy for everyone.

One thought on “Oblivious No More

  1. Pingback: Happy Cluelessness | Citizen Judie

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