People are people.

I feel so relaxed watching people. I don’t mean it in a creepy, stalkerish kind of way. See, in between reading while having iced coffee, I enjoy looking at people walking; observing their behavior, and occasionally – although incidentally – listening in to conversations.

I take pleasure from looking at a busy canvas. This explains why, if given a choice, I would like a high rise condo unit overlooking the city, the business district, than one overlooking the bay. I love staying in beach resorts but the tranquility of the beach front gets old easily.

I do not know where this stemmed from given my short attention span for crowds. I never liked being with groups of people for long periods of time. It doesn’t mean I dislike people; if anything, I even have what we can call “passive fascination”. However, I tend to move away after sometime, and rejoin when I feel like it. I remember a party at the home of one of my former officemates; in the midst of the party, I retreated to a corner of his makeshift library and he caught me, a glass of wine in hand, reading Franz Kafka. He gave the book to me before I went home that night. Also during our enjoyable game nights in SanLo, during eating breaks, I would go upstairs and sit on the floor in front of the Howes’ huge bookshelves. I functioned much better because of it.

I guess I am leaning towards introversion. Yes, I do know many people, but it doesn’t mean they know me, too. I am known to share lots of things to people I feel affinity for but not to sound eerie, I am keeping more things inside me. I once told someone I am a big tip of an iceberg, pun intended.

I like what people see in me now. I reached a point where I was working hard to ensure that people see me in a way that I want to be seen. Until I grew up. Well, sort of. I got tired keeping up. So I learned to simply sift. My energy can only last long and I learned to use them on activities I love and people I want to be with. There are still lapses and boredom and confusion and disappointment but I’m wading my way through them each time.

Anyway, my bottomline is that I like people. And that I made it through another attempt at an introspective post using Sascha. Like people, I’m beginning to like her now.

Have a great Wednesday night, you all.


  1. […] there and I think it’s never gonna go away. Maybe it was sidetracked a bit because of people. My kind of introversion sometimes finds solace from being pulled in by people. And finding someone to potentially victimize, errrr, fall in love with must have contributed. […]

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