First day high

My first class for the year ended late. I think it’s going to be that way always. I have no complaints though. I always like it when professors extend especially when they have something substantial to share.

As usual, the old sickness struck. Hmph. I cannot believe that after a semester of gazillions of reading materials, and a barrage of new ones this sem, I still can’t be one of them. God, where was I when defining moments unfolded? As Chelli often tell people before, “Can you get your mind out of the gutter?” I simply can’t!

I guess I’m just insecure. Besides, most of my classmates do work for organizations related to the courses we take. Oh well, I really feel so bobo everytime I’m inside that room. It disappoints me that parang I’m forever an absorber of these information. I can’t pretend I know them because I really don’t. I feel my self-esteem go down the drain whenever they would discuss events or theories and I can’t contribute. Parang, Jesus, what have I been doing with my life kaya I didn’t know those things? Well, I don’t aspire to know everything naman. Ay ewan, insecure lang siguro ako. For someone who reads a lot, it’s funny how I’m still at a loss with many pertinent things.

As they say, kaya ka nga nag-aaral to get new information. But you know, this is graduate school and you are supposed to know some things. Hay, kunyari na lang shy type ako. I can just imagine what a doofus I’ll be when I open my mouth in my future reports, na halos magkasunod pa ngayon, as my professor convinced me to take a topic that should be reported in class on the 10th. It’s already the 3rd. The report in the other class will be on the 9th, with a book review to top it. Sige, tanungin nyo ako kung gaano pa lang kadami ang nababasa ko. 🙂

I’m back to academic hell. I’m alive again.

P.S. Yung pagkahilig ko sa showbiz, kung sa mga ganitong academic stuff ko naibabaling, malamang hindi ako masyadong naloloka. Malapit na ako magbilang ng strands ng buhok. And yes, I still have work at may department newsletter pa ako na due na…nung isang taon pa!

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