Dieting, Goodbyes and a Foiled Plan

I wasn’t able to go to La Solidaridad as planned. It’s not a real major bummer except that it was.:D Originally, I planned to accompany a visitor from another Post overseas (Marshall Islands) to Robinson’s Place, then I go ahead to the bookshop. Since it was raining, she had the hotel driver drive us to the mall and drop us off at the P. Gil side. It was hard finding a chance to pop the question of my leaving her behind because upon admission, it was her first time to be in a big mall (then I told her that she should go to SM Mall of Asia:D). Plus, she’s still having a hard time paying in pesos and she wanted to buy some stuff so I had to accompany her as she shopped. In the end, she bought wardrobes that she can wear on the remaining days that she will make her rounds in the department.

That visitor is different in that she is the same as us, Filipinos. Weird ba? Anyway, I don’t know how I fare in terms of accomodating overseas visitors. Just because she’s having a hard time understanding some of our questions, I MAY have made her feel that I think she’s stupid. Whatever. She hopes to invite me in the coming days for dinner so I guess she did appreciate my going with her.:D

On another matter, one of our beloved officers had his farewell pizza party this afternoon. In this “business”, it’s very rare to find an officer who would not be forgotten. There are very few of them who sincerely made us feel that we matter (not that we always fish for appreciation but it’s different when people are so high-strung you can just wrap your angry hands on their necks so their eyeballs would come out of the sockets- grrr!!!). Anyway, we will definitely miss Shawn. I guess being in this line of work prepares and hones your coping mechanism with people coming in and out of your life.

A pseudo-goodbye in the offing is my feelings for Steve. I know there is always something in Psychology that would explain why he acts like that. A tiny part of me still rationalizes that all his reactions, especially the recent one that particularly pertains to us, are second-hand information. However, I can’t seem to tolerate defending, even to myself, the level of arrogance that he allegedly displays. I really don’t know. He has not done anything to make me feel negatively but he has not done anything to make me feel good about him apart from casual hellos and smiles either. Let’s see. I rarely think of him now anyway. Although, Joy’s boss already knew I’m the secret a.k.a. the one who has the hots for Steve. Oh well, not a big deal, even if it reaches him. Last I checked, this is still a democratic country.:)

Plus I have more things to worry about and one of them is my eating patterns. I managed to shed a few pounds a few weeks ago and I still maintain it as of now but I know that in the coming days, I will start bloating again. Guilt is a bummer. I don’t feel like this towards eating before. For almost two weeks, I’ve been alternating my oatmeal lunch for real meals, and it really has made me guilty. I’ve not thought of sticking my finger on my throat though, but I mentally blame myself for every consumed heavy meals. Then I punish myself by doing sit-ups till my tummy hurts like it’s been cut in half. What an outrageous way to cope with my eating habits! I have a disorder!

For now, I have to move on (and pee—:D). Life is short. (And so is Steve.) Hahaha. Joke.  

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